Week four, day three: The floodgates burst

Poor little A. finally opened up to me about how he is feeling. It was more like his floodgates burst open.

We had a good day today. After I put the boys to bed, I sat on the floor with a book until I. fell asleep. Then, just as I do every night, I kissed A. on the forehead, blessed him and said goodnight. He cheerily replied good night. I went to do laundry.

Ten minutes later I heard him sobbing and saying, "Oh no, oh no." I ran into the room -- had he wet the bed? -- and found a little boy with a broken heart.

"Mommy, I miss Daddy so much! I'm so sad for my Daddy. I want him to come home. And I'm sorry for being bad. I miss my Daddy. And my guardian angel is sad for Daddy too."

"A., it's okay to miss Daddy. It's okay to cry and be sad. I miss Daddy too."

A's skinny little body, so tense as I held him, melted.

"It's okay?"

"Yes, but it's not okay to be mean to Mommy or I. or Baby N. It's okay to be sad or even angry about Daddy going away. But you need to say it with words."

"Okay, Mommy."

So for the next 10 minutes he poured his little heart out. We talked about the fun things he's done with his father, he things we wished Daddy had done with him since he left, what he'll tell Daddy the next time he calls.

I stayed in the room until he fell asleep; he told me he was scared to sleep without Daddy in the house. I tried to reassure him; I told him I would always be in the house while he slept -- and if not me then Grandma G.

I'm glad this happened. It cleared the air between us. And he now knows he can tell me about his feelings, no matter how negative.

Here's hoping his behaviour improves now that he got that off his chest.