You recently sent a school newsletter home in my son's backpack, a week after the date printed on the top. The events section listed two events at the school earlier this week, one of which I completely missed. For the other one, I had to call half the mommies in the class until one of them knew the time we were supposed to show up. The newsletter asked parents to call and volunteer for the events. I would have raised my hand, but I had no idea you needed help, since the newsletter was a week late.
Most of the parents at our school are pretty smart, with lots of common sense, but few of us have PhDs in educational theory and jargon. I have an honours degree, and I still scratch my head over the newsletter when it is filled with phrases such as "there are many initiatives/programs that the school has implemented in supporting students." What are you really trying to say? First off, you are misusing the word "initiative;" it does not mean a program. It means personal drive or ambition. And what do you really mean when you say you have implemented programs that support students? Are you talking about school counsellors? Anti-bullying programs? Hall monitors? By saying "supportive programs", you don't have to get specific, which means you are communicating essentially nothing to the parent. And what do you mean by implemented? Did you put up a "bullies suck" poster and walk away? What has the school achieved in its program? Have incidents of bullying gone down? Give me details.
When you use big, fancy and vague words, you are not communicating with parents. You are stressing us out as we try to decipher what the bafflegab really means as we read the newsletter while cheering a soccer team or cooking dinner.
Even worse is the lack of correct grammar and punctuation (and sometimes spelling!) in these newsletters. Quotation marks are not used for emphasis. Use bold. Or italics. Anything other than "SCARE QUOTES WITH CAPS."
You don't need to capitalize every third word. In School Suspension may look impressive to you, but it's poor grammar. You're giving me a face tic. Stop it.
Finally, please stop calling yourselves administrators and educators. I don't care about your job classification. I care about what you actually do in my child's school. Are you in charge? Then you're the principal or vice-principal. Do you teach? Then you're a teacher. Stop confusing us with pompous titles.
I know your hearts are in the right place. I know this is a terrific school, and my kids love attending it. I know you have great teachers; both of my boys have dream teachers.
Please don't make me pull out my old grease pen and send back the newsletter after I vet it.
1 comment:
I think I have a beheading knife around here somewhere. I could send it down to you.
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