I've been commenting elsewhere and on Facebook about my feelings on the media collapse. I have to admit much of it is selfish, because it looks like I will never get to go back. Tonight, after a busy evening with the brood, I'm remembering why I left in the first place.
For N.: I've been mourning my career, and my youthful appearance, and all I gave up for you to be here, and for the family to be in a financial position to raise three kids.
I will always regret leaving journalism. But I will never, ever regret leaving it for you and your brothers.
For the boys: You may not hear me on the radio anymore, but you see me every night. And my feelings of wasted talent are nothing compared to how I used to feel about my wasted motherhood.
I love you all. You are worth it. Keep reminding me of that.
4 comments:
The most important job you will ever do is raising & loving your family.
As I get older & reflect about days gone by I have regrets but none about my career or lack or one.My biggest regrets are more about the extra hours my job took away from you kids.
I had to work but I wish I had spent my hours home doing more fun things with you guys.
I guess you do get wiser as you get older but sometimes the wisdom comes too late.
You are very wise for your years and once again you make me proud to be your Mother.
*snif* Thanks, Mom. You did so much to give me my chance -- I'm glad you don't see it as wasted.
Very new to your blog so I don't know the history. I do feel the emotion in this post and, as one who left a 20 year protestant pay cheque to become a Catholic nearly four years ago and still struggling financially but happy to be putting faith and family first.
I also get the connection in the beautiful sentiment to DiFranco's line in the title of the post.
Another side of me feels my inner cynic noting the irony of the right of Ani's born baby to be here while at the same time Ani is an active proponent of abortion. Even with objective truth it's a mixed up world. I understand I am making a point not on topic with the theme of the post and I apologize for that as I express the thought that hit my heart as I listened to the song. I should note I'm not anti Ani. She's one of our greats along with dear Mr. Cohen. So many times music of the likes of these touch me though some of their moral and political stands leave me at odds.
Keep on at the most important job any of us may ever have. God bless.
Owen (in Windsor ON where so many jobs have tanked)
owenswain.com = art
luminousmiseries.ca = poetry/faith
Owen, I just saw this.
Yes, yes, you are so right, my Catholic brother! The most shocking thing about this song is that line, especially if you know Ani has had an abortion and wrote about it in her spoken word work "Tiptoe."
That background speaks to mine, as readers who know my personal history will attest. I was a radical, pro-abortion feminist for years, redeemed by God's grace and many prayers. I am now a Catholic who tries to live the teachings of the Church, is pro-life, and who does not use artificial birth control.
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